I will be the first to admit to you that, from time to time, I feel a strong urge to just totally dump politics and never blog about them again. As a matter of fact, I think I've penned a post or two suggesting that this is what I would do.
Inevitably however, the silly season (elections) start ramping up and I find myself interested again so I pen a political blog post. I feel that I can do this because a.) I offer no claims of credibility and b.) I'm sure many of the people who would like to call me on this have either stopped reading this blog long ago because of some imagined slight or they just don't remember.
With that said, what follows is a political post.
Not national politics, of course, because I find it too easy to just pen a post saying "Democrats are Stupid!" (many are) or that "Republicans have turned their backs on the voters!" (many have) and then make some snide remark about either Obama golfing while the world burns, or Obamacare being a tax disaster, or Hillary and Chelsea Clinton not grasping the fact that THEY are the .001% of the 1% and their entire campaign being built on a false premise, or Boehner crying or John McCain being an idiot again. While the above is a sure-fire way to get page hits and praise/condemnation from those who believe in the black/white hat theory of partisan politics I find it much more interesting to blog about local politics.
One reason for this is because the hats politicians wear are often different shades of gray. For another, the decisions, obsessions and indifferences of the local pols are more likely to have a direct effect on my daily life. Another reason is simple: In Houston, the coverage of local politics is (mostly) awful. You are either stuck with whatever institutional source material the Chron has decided to regurgitate unquestioningly, hi-ho party bloggers or (worst of all) smartest-guy-in-the-room contrarians who shit allegiances with the tide or, more realistically, toward whatever politician decides to pay attention to them at the moment.
All of this leads us, conveniently, to Harris County traffic.
It's awful, we all know this. I could end this post here but that wouldn't be right considering that there's a LOT of blame to go around.
First: Harris County drivers.
It's easy to look at Houston's dilapidated streets and say that our ruling class is 100% to blame. This is easy but not entirely fair. So before we go any further I think it's right that you, Harris County car driver, are reminded of a few simple rules of the road:
1. Stop cutting in line. If you know your exit is coming then pull into the lane early. Don't wait until the last minute to try and wedge in between an 18-wheeler hauling gasoline and a family of six trying to get the kids to school. Even worse is when you (usually driving a pick-up) forget the fact that your truck-bed is actually attached to your car and it's still sticking out into the lane you are trying to leave blocking those people as well. Have a little foresight and get over earlier. Finally, if you leave the line and then try to get back in line later I believe that the police should have the legal option of shooting out your tires, and immediately towing your vehicle. Especially if you commit the two previous sins listed above.
2. Stop cutting in line. I just felt I needed to say this twice.
3. In addition to speed limit maximums, there are speed limit minimums as well. Not that I'm intentionally picking on pickup trucks here, but they seem to be serial offenders. For some reason your standard pickup driver in Houston is only capable of two speeds: Either a warp level that would make Mr. Scott nervous or glacially slow. There is no in between. How you drive on the open highway is none of my concern. But if you can't stay within the flow of traffic during rush hour then please, take the bus.
4. Please stop talking/texting and trying to make 7-lane changes. At some point, we're going to have driverless cars and you'll be able to sext to your side-piece while in your car, until then, just stop. People who do this like to point out that there's no law banning texting or talking on one's phone while driving in Texas but, in fact, they are wrong. It is illegal to drive while distracted in Texas and it's a law I wish officers would enforce more strongly.
5. If you are going to make a right turn, please stop rushing past someone only to pull into the lane, slam on the breaks and turn right in front of them. Were I King of Texas the penalty for this would be caning. Not only is this dangerous, but it says to everyone around that you either have no depth perception or that you're such a gormless prat that you don't care what happens to anyone around you.
6. Finally, and most importantly, there are others around you. Please be cognizant of that fact. I've often said that Houston drivers are not especially bad, they just lack spatial awareness. Understand that when you attempt to make a 5 lane change to get to the exit you forgot you needed to take there are, in fact, other motorists behind you who don't expect someone to drive like a directionless twit. I understand that checking mirrors and signaling before lane changes is quaint, but it sure would cut down on the accident rate.
Second: Harris County Elected Officials
Thought you were getting off easy didn't you? Well, the truth is you're a big part of the problem as well.
1. Potholes. I realize that the Houston Chronicle has now decided that all is hunky-dory since Mayor Parker issued a call-to-arms (before throwing a tiny amount of money at the problem then immediately leaving for another party-with-others-in-the-ruling-class junket) but the fact is that there are still an awful lot of potholes out there and, in most cases, the 'fix' that Public Works claims to have done does nothing more than turn a tire killing pothole into a suspension killing speed bump. I'm entirely serious here. I've seen fixed potholes that look like scale models of the Matterhorn. Even someone who hasn't completed Jr. High can work a trowel after all. Here's another quaint idea: Do the job correctly and completely the first time.
2. Capacity. I'm not entirely sure what the engineered vehicle count limits are for Houston's infrastructure, but I'm almost positive that we've exceeded them. While the easy solution is to "pour more asphalt" I understand that, in the current political environment, this is both cost-prohibitive as well as sure to bring a round-of cries from Houston's unproductive class (more on them in a minute.) I saw a local Houstonian (and for the life of me I can't find the link, so if it was you, please link your story to the comments and I'll edit) recommend remaking Houston's Interstates into double decker expressways. I like this idea for two reasons: 1. It wouldn't involve troublesome issues of imminent domain and 2. If designed properly (big if) it could allow 18-wheelers easy access in and out of the city while the local commuter was able to actually get to an exit without having to bob and weave like Barry Sanders running behind the Lion's colander of an offensive line.
3. Light sequencing. Note here that I don't say synchronization. The latter would be a horrible idea. The fact is however that in most of Harris County much of the congestion is caused by shoddily sequenced traffic lights. Want to test your patience? Try to drive down West Little York between Hwy 290 and Hwy 6 almost any time of day. As a matter of fact, try to drive down almost any street in Houston at the posted speed without being stopped at almost every light. In many cases, it cannot be done even if you drive above the speed limit (illegal) or creep along slowly (unsafe). There was a story printed at one time (which, again, I can't find online) that Harris County actually had a chance to purchase light-sequencing software for $500K but "it had other priorities". One assumes that power-washing the Astrodome was more important than people being productive and getting to work safely and on-time.
4. Public Transportation. This hurts to say because I love me some public transportation when done right. Unfortunately, Houston Metro is not doing it right so it's time to starve the beast and redeploy the monies to road maintenance and construction. Maybe, once the current regime is gone we can get some people in who understand what the real role of public transportation is (to move people from point to point efficiently) versus what they want it to be (wedding venues for the unproductive class and baubles designed to bring events to town).
Last: The Unproductive Class
For you, I have only two things.
1. Just. Stop. We realize that you have just as much a right to make an argument as the next person. We also acknowledge that, as residents of Houston, you probably paid sales tax on a mixed drink from time to time and have put money in the city and county coffers. However, just because you went to Europe once or twice and rode on a really neat train or streetcar there doesn't mean that the same set-up is going to work well in Houston. Also, your insistence that everyone move inside Loop 610 is impractical. A better use of your time would be to try and figure out how to get people from outside the central core, into job centers.
2. You cannot have your cake and eat it to. This goes out mainly to Critical Mass, the cycling group that violated traffic lights, berated motorists and generally created civic danger situations during their monthly protest rides. I get that you are angry that motorists are parking on the dedicated bicycle lane downtown. For the most part, I'm sure most of this is due to ignorance. But, if the motorists would be doing this as some kind of protest how is this any different than the idiocy that you used to partake in when you blocked intersections illegally, banged on the hoods of cars who tried to pass on a green light, and (according to reports) delayed the access of first responders to get to victims? One of the biggest problems with activism is that the activists typically choose to pick and choose when rules get followed. Were I you I'd focus on lobbying Houston to continue to develop a real, workable bike path system that let's you get where you need to go, and also to ensure that the last 1000 yards that require you to ride on surface streets is safe and efficient. Of course, that's just me, I'm not an activist.
Transportation infrastructure is bad across the State, either through negligence or buffoonery our local and State elected officials have been desperately attempting to provide content for election hand-outs, trying to swap trinkets for votes, or supplying red meat to the laundry-list of political activists who issue voter guides. They also suffer from "Something! Must be done." syndrome which supposes that for every imagined problem, there is either a law, ordinance or regulation that can fix it. Better governance would be to fully handle requirements first, the important things next, and only after everything is fully funded and everything is running at peak efficiency do you start asking questions. Even at that point (and Houston and Texas are nowhere NEAR that point) the default answer should be to leave well enough alone.
First though, let's get things moving. Of course, this might mean that $243 Million for the Astrodome be directed toward better uses, as might the proposed $50 Million for Reliant Park upgrades.
